Skip to main content

It's getting better all the time? Part 2

As Spring becomes more present, as we start moving our bodies more, particularly outside, I turn my attention to a more micro understanding of "better". What does it mean to you, to be "doing better"? Even without the comparing-ourselves-to-others perspective I discussed in the part 1, what is at the root of the aspiration to better ourselves, for instance, do be fitter? I am certain that most of us know and appreciate the value of living a healthy lifestyle, eating nutritious food and exercising. But to what extent are some of us pushing our respective bodies beyond what is available to them without accounting for aging, physical or mental limitations? Are we adding guilt and shame where these emotions are not functional? It is an interesting tension to try and hold- striving to be healthy and fit AND accepting our bodies for what they can do at this moment in time. Maybe it is worthwhile for us to stop searching for "better" and start looking for "good", "happy" or "content" in what is possible.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Honouring the Available

 What a year we are having! From early 2020, we have been dealing with the pain and loss of Corona-related illness and deaths, isolation, uncertainty, financial strain and loneliness. We are also seeing important shifts toward a more just, less racist, less greedy societies. It is quite the turmoil and it requires two things that most of us have difficulty doing- slowing down, and surrendering to the unknown. This is particularly challenging if you are a planner/organizer, who finds comfort in structures, preparations and set timelines. It may feel like you have no anchor beneath you, like everything is chaotic, unpredictable and unsound, as if the ground beneath you is shaky. There are many online resources on calming and grounding methods, and on practical tools for creating a structure for oneself is this somewhat structure-less time. What I suggest we add is a gentle, compassionate, self-assessment tool: "What is available to me right now?". The answer can direct us away ...

Holocaust Remembrance Day reflection

Brown eyes are a danger to have, No matter how pretty they may be, shaped like big marbles or almonds, They bring suspicion, they make you A non-human, deserving of humiliation, or hurt, or death, Whether you are a young woman who just married, a Rabbi, a barber, a poet, the village Shochet, or A brown-eyed baby. Brown eyes. Brown hair. Brown skin; Colourless compassion is needed. With immense gratitude to Ettie Miller, for sharing her family's painful and wonderful story of survival.

Emotional Fixers- Rewards and Risks

Are you an emotional fixer? Is it your role to make sure that the people you care about are happy and content? That there is harmony- always- and agreement for everyone around you? While peace and understanding are goals for which to strive, you may want to ask yourself a few questions: Is the harmony coming at the cost of minimizing, even eliminating, your own needs? Who assigned you this role? Are you trying to fix someone else's emotional distress for them? I believe that respectful conflict is essential to healthy relationships and that disagreements can be one way in which values are explored and refined. In my personal and professional experience, I have seen the emotional fixer take the impossible task of pleasing others and trying to heal wounds that are not their own, but it is never enough... We all have a responsibility to do our own emotional work. You can be caring, loving and supportive while setting healthy boundaries between you and others. Otherwise, the risk to y...